Wednesday 20 September 2017

Letter of Introduction

Dear Mr Brad Blackstone,

Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Tan Jing Yi. I am currently an undergraduate student at Singapore Institute of Technology pursuing an honours degree in Telematics. I graduated from Temasek Polytechnic with the diploma in 3D Interactive Media Technology. Over the course of my study, I have acquired skills such as 3D modelling and programming. Apart from my studies, I took up part-time jobs ranging from retail to service, and I am currently an administrative staff at a tuition centre.

After graduating, I was looking for relevant degree programmes I could apply from my diploma. I chanced upon this course and I went to read up more about it. From my reading, I found out that this multi-disciplinary programme allows me to be well-equipped with engineering and computer science knowledge. With skills that are specialized in this area, I would be able to pursue the prospective career path where manpower are needed. This fueled my interest in taking up the programme as I saw a potentially good career path.

I am someone who is not afraid to communicate with strangers, which is where my strength lies. I enjoy communicating with people from all walks of life. However, I get nervous in front of a huge crowd at times and will be unable to deliver my message across efficiently. I hope that through this module, I am able to sharpen my presentation skills and hopefully, overcome my fear of talking in front of a crowd. I believe that improving my communication skills will help me greatly in the future when I have to meet important clients or communicate with my superior or colleagues.

I look forward to our classes in the future and seeing the transition in me.

Best regards,
Tan Jing Yi

Edited: 27 September 2017

10 comments:

  1. All of the points are clear and allows the reader to understand the formal letter easily.

    Excellent!

    Yours sincerely,
    Goh Xin Chun

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your kind words XinChun! :)

      Delete
  2. Hi Jingyi!
    I agree with Xin Chun, your letter is easy to read and understand. However I feel that the capitalization of some of your titles is misused. Correct me if I'm wrong, though.
    Looking forward to working with you for our assignment!

    Kind Regards,
    Pereira Nathaniel Joseph

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    Replies
    1. Hi Nathaniel, thank you for your kind words! I believe i made some mistakes on capitalisation as well. Looking forward to working with you as well! Cheers :)

      Delete
  3. Dear JY,

    Thank you for this fairly well developed formal letter. I appreciate how you paint a picture of your background and interest in studying telematics at SIT. In particular, you explain how you researched your career possibilities. What a wise approach!

    You also do a fine job of describing what you see as your communication strength and a weakness and you tie these to your goals.

    In terms of language issues, there are a few items to take into consideration.

    1) Allow me to introduce myself, my name is Tan Jing Yi. >>> (comma splice) Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Tan Jing Yi.
    2) I happen to chanced upon this course ... >>> (verb form use)
    3) where man powers are needed ... >>> (Just man powers? What about women powers? By the way, manpower is one word, right?)
    4) I hope that through this module, I am able to sharpen my presentation skills and hopefully.... >>> (redundancy)
    5) ...by improving my communication skills, it would help me.... >>>> (phrasing/verb tense) improving my communication skills will help me

    None of this should eclipse the effort you made with this assignment.

    I look forward to reading more of your writing.

    Brad

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    Replies
    1. Dear Brad,
      thank you for your kind words and for pointing out my mistakes so specifically. I will definitely look into them and hopefully along the way I will be able to make less mistakes. I'm looking forward to your future critique as well as I believe it will help me to improve my language. Cheers!

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  4. Hi JayWhy
    I like how you had clarity of thought in that your essay was very well structured. I would never have guessed that you came from a media-animation background prior to reading this letter. I now have very high hopes in you as I believe your 3D modelling skills will come in very handy in our group work together.

    You are a very approachable and likable character. I believe you will undergo an amazing transition over the next few years in school under Brad's professional guidance :)

    Best of luck!
    Brandon

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    Replies
    1. Hi Brandon, I am deeply humbled by your kind words! Thank you and I appreciate them. I am looking forward to the transition in me as well. Looking forward to work with you in the coming years. Cheers!

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  5. Hi Jingyi,

    Your letter is well-written and structured nicely, making it easy for your readers to appreciate and comprehend.

    I also wish to acknowledge the fact that you have taken a thorough and objective look at your future plans, and I look forward to working with you as we strive to do our best and aim towards completing our studies in SIT!

    Cheers!
    Keith Chong

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    Replies
    1. Hi Keith,
      thank you for the kind words! :-) I am looking forward to working with you as well in the future! Cheers!

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